… about 2,000 years ago when some guy who allegedly said how great it would be if everyone was nice to each other for a change, and got nailed to a cross for his troubles. Rumours that his persecutors asked him to cross his legs as they only had one nail left really should be consigned to the Urban Legend dustbin. Various outrageous heretics, scumbags, apostates, and general troublemakers since then have maintained that, indeed, much that was said and written (as in “it is written”) about the guy, primarily the allegation that he among all those crucified that day (so may be they did run out of nails) was actually the son of some “God entity” should also be consigned to the Urban Legend dustbin.

In a miracle (sic) of propagandist technique pre-dating modern electronic means of mass brainwashing and is information propagation, fans memorialised this man who became widely known of, in a part: the “New Testament”, of a magnificent work of literature called “The Bible”. This “New Testament” on the whole is flattering of this guy, widely known as Jesus, or the Messiah, albeit it does make absolutely clear that he is the Mother of all Mysogenist Pigs, advocating as he did that men may have as many wives as desired, discard any ones at will, and generally act like unfaithful randy fuck-machines; whereas if any of the wives, even those discarded, behave in any way similarly, verily they shall be stoned to death. This hasn’t really been a problem though: devotees are careful, on the whole, just to ignore this part of a very large work, preferring even to concentrate on the totally horrific death and destruction that awaits unbelievers, described in the work’s final chapter, which it is fair to describe as more blood thirsty than Hollywood, rather than dwell on the unfortuneate clear mysogeny of the hero.

In widely held opinions since the events alleged to have surrounded the Messiah’s life, it was held that unbelievers should themselves be crucified or burned at the stake, as indeed many were.

And now the latest news. Since the above alleged events 10 gazillion people, thereabouts, have been brutally murdered, starved to death, tortured, raped, pillaged, often, though not always, in infighting between factions of believers in the above said God Entity. Unbelievers in distant lands have been wiped out en masse, a practice that became so common that it was named: genocide. The most effective, and probably the largest example of this was the genocide committed by Europeans in a land now known as the USA, where Europeans are now the dominant faction, and incidentally amongst the strongest fans of the Messiah. These actions attracted the beaming admiration of a man who some allege, very possibly not incorrectly, to have been the most evil bastard ever – quite an achievement against terrifically strong, and still ongoing, competition – he was another European by the name of Adolf Hitler. With a few blips here and there, so far in human history, these actions have increased with each passing century aided by what has become known as the “wonders” of modern technology.

In addition many have been imprisoned, sometimes for decades, often on the say so of false witnesses (that’s: fucking liars, in the current vernacular – sorry, I’ve been reading the Guardian), mistreated, insulted, but remarkably on occasion maintained a dignity that can be described as nothing short of divine.